“You could not let your failures define you.”
What are failures?
We could say failures can be the first step to success, or sometimes doesn’t even exist. But I say failures are blessings in order to get to that place you want to be. Why? Since this world rotates in ’cause and effect’, the inconsistency of that matter is nothing to be generalized as successful. ‘Failures as blessings’ allows one to understand what to do once failure itself occurs to the point he wants to be at—out of success. It’s basically like realizing grammatical errors on a sentence, so whenever you compose another sentence, you would be aware of the errors that you can make. “Failures are like medicines, you are aware that you wanna be stronger, yet you know you’ll take it maybe once, twice, or even every single day of your life. It may cause you side effects, but you know it’ll make you reach to that peak.” For me, a failure can be implied as a result of determination deprivation—a lack of firmness in purpose on controlling or deciding of something’s nature or outcome. On similar means, it can be God’s wake up call for you to realize a reality check on determination. In fact, God knows our plans and what’s best for us. Failures are something not everyone experience—maybe impossible, but minimal.
I always ascribe on my mindset the scientific method of decision making having a big influence on its result, typically, never letting an instance pass without a careful decision. On second thought, I may draw onto a conclusion wherein it comes naturally on me. Though, sometimes there are instances wherein what you plan isn’t going to get as successful as you plan it to be.
An instance wherein I experienced this so-called “failure” was during last year’s traumatic days of the college entrance examinations. I prioritized the Ateneo de Manila University College Entrance Test. It took me numerous times of reviewing to ensure my capability of passing (those silent consecrations I had every night that gave me some hope of chance). In certainty, I never exerted loads of effort in studying that much in my whole life. Last year, when the results came, I failed it. I wasn’t that disappointed since I knew it was strenuous. Yes, I had doubts and misconceptions at first, but further on, a shrewdness of faith kept me from continuing the game. All my dedications and prayers weren’t useless either, it actually made me a more determinative and more competitive individual. Even until now, it had been progressing my drive in which my passion to transfer had become advantageous. During the process, I felt God onto my life. He was always with me, guiding…. even though sometimes it’s hard to conspire the presence of God, one must always reflect on it through actions.
In good faith, from what impelled me to be determined lies an inner feeling of the presence of a sense of Pentecost emerging. Collaboratively, it’s such a feeling for me and the Holy Trinity to connect so well in terms of these challenges. On the same note, I knew that it happened for a reason. I perceived a moment of realization wherein there is more than what God planned for me, even for that one big dream I am aspiring for. At those times, I knew there was something going on. Even though the verity wherein I put my whole efforts onto prayers for my acceptance was a mere fact that I knew his answer was just a wake up for call for me to improve more—since He knew that I wasn’t ready yet. I was quite disappointed, but I needed to reflect from it. This made me to self-actualization that for whatever decision He made, it was for my virtue. But I’m not saying it would stop me from moving on, this just means that His way on coming along my life was a clever one. Knowing along that I wasn’t ready yet, I needed to change more, improve more, and want more. To get ready for the choice I want to commit for is again another blessing to realize. This was just a matter of test. The precious gift of faith in the saving work of our Lord Jesus Christ is the reason why on this continuing journey, such joy and thanksgiving should betake my way.